Updates: Saturday November 28, 2009.

-back in portland, hattie is in midcoast still.

-had thanksgiving at my new small little studio.

-really want to go to a culinary program.

-going to get my GED, i’ve decided, finally.

- getting back into music and video games.

-reading a very helpful book on codependency and helping yourself before anyone else. which is what i need to start doing.

-20th birthday is in about 8 days! will no longer be a teenager, although it is still dubious i ever was.

-writing my stories again.

-getting back in touch with old friends who are decent people.

-organizing, bought a planner/date book to write my appointments in. that’s helping a lot.

-Dwayne has been around some, and i am grateful for that.

-going to get my GA and subsidy all figured out so i should be all set, which will be BALLIN.

-am feeling a lot better, more stable, happier to some degree, at least feeling the potential to be happier.

-want to start seeking out decent, nice people to be my friends, good, solid people like i’ve never really have. i want stability more than anything right now. at least people who care about me and i can call when i feel like shit, go out for walks with, play video games with, spend nights in with and be normal with. no substances, or at least very, very little and very rarely. people who want to build pillow forts and have snowball fights and like action figures and appreciate the appeal of a gigantic pink soft stuffed animal octopus named Milo Goes To College. people who like the Goosebumps series and can discuss how they wished they had friends who climbed ladders into their rooms like Clarrisa. People who won’t judge me for reading the Archie comics seriously.

-today i am going to do a little more research, pick up a bus schedule, maybe head out to the mall to look for santa and ask him to help with a lot of things. he’s no Macy’s santa (if he’s even there) but he’ll do. write down all my appointments. call a few people, hope that Kevin gives me a call and maybe wants to hang out before he goes back to school. maybe, maybe not. we will see. it’d be nice though.

Anyway- I hope you have all been doing very well. Keep it real, bros and ladies. Merry “Heavy Commercial Push” Part Of The Holidays.